Humour@TheAtomicMoose.ca: "EVERYBODY" KNOWS BUBBA

Subjects

"EVERYBODY" KNOWS BUBBA

There was a man named Bubba and Bubba knew EVERYONE in the whole world!!! Once, when Bubba got a new job, he said to his new boss, "Boss, I know everyone in the whole world!"

His boss doesn't believe him, so he said, "No you do not know everyone in the whole world." But Bubba countered, "Yes I do!" Bubba's boss said, "Well prove it!"

"Pick someone," stated Bubba, "and I know them!"

Well Bubba's boss thought for a minute and then came up with a name. "Tom Selleck! I bet you don't know Tom Selleck!"

Bubba mused, "Tom Selleck! Tom and I were in Boy Scouts together when we were kids!"

But Bubba's boss says, "No you weren't!"

Bubba countered, "Yes we were!"

So naturally, they fly to Hollywood and drove to Tom Selleck's house. Bubba knocks on the door and Tom Selleck answered. Bubba said, "Tom!!!" and Tom exclaimed, "Bubba!" They hug and catch up on the past for half an hour. Bubba's boss can't believe it, but then he thought, "Well that could happen, it's just one person," so he told Bubba, who challenged, "OK, pick somebody else!"

This time Bubba's boss has someone in mind, "the President, Bill Clinton! You don't know Bill Clinton!"

Bubba replied, "Oh sure I do! Bill and I were on the debating team together in college!"

Bubba's boss said, "No you weren't!" But Bubba insisted, so they flew to Washington and catch up with the President at a press conference. They work their way through the crowd until Bubba got close enough to catch Clinton's eye and waved, "Bill!"

The President waved, "Bubba!" After the press conference they hugged and catch up on the past for half an hour. Clinton even offered Bubba an intern.

Bubba's boss is stunned; he can't believe it. Still skeptical, he said to Bubba, "Well, that's just two people in one country. That doesn't mean he knows everyone in the whole world!" Bubba replied,

"OK, pick someone out of the world spectrum and I know them!"

Bubba's boss knew just who to pick, "The Pope! You do not know the Pope!" "Sure, the Pope BAPTIZED me!" claimed Bubba.

Bubba's boss indignantly replied, "No he didn't!" But Bubba insisted, so they flew to Rome where the Pope is giving Mass in front of hundreds of thousands of people.

They work their way through the crowd, without much luck. Bubba said, "Boss, we're never gonna get there together through all these people so I tell you what; I'll work my way up there and when I do, I'll give you a sign that shows you I know the Pope!"

Bubba left while his boss waited and waited and waited. Just when he was about to give up, he saw the Pope come out onto the balcony and right there beside him is Bubba! Shortly afterwards, Bubba's boss passed out.

Bubba returned to find has boss passed out. He brought him around saying, "Boss! Boss! Wake up!" When his boss came to, he asked, "What happened?"

Bubba's boss conceded, "OK, I can see Tom Selleck. I can see Bill Clinton... hell, I can even take the Pope! But when somebody standing next to me asked, 'Who's that on the balcony, with Bubba?'... that was a little more than I can handle!"

Back